"I Will Not Forget" - Story Behind the Song

I had my facts a little wrong when I made the video for this song, but they weren't so terribly off to justify a redo (and honestly, I didn't want to redo the whole thing). The truth is, we hadn't yet opened our restaurant. We were just a couple of months away from opening actually. But those months before the opening were very busy and stressful. I guess it felt like we were open already! Anyway, sorry about that! =/

I looked back in the journal from when I wrote this and there was a combination of health issues and life itself (opening a restaurant, along with all the other stuff) that was weighing on me. The journal entry below contains my prayer to the Lord for that day and what He spoke to my heart:

1-8-07 "...You have made me glad in spite of how the natural things are. I'm going to rejoice in You today for all You are in my life and all You've done. Nothing compares to You, Lord. Your goodness is better than anything in my life being good. I will continue to praise You and thank You for the difficulties. You have upheld me with Your strength and taught me how to rely on You. As You continue teaching me more, help me to be grateful for Your hand in my life. Give me a grateful heart.

'...You can enjoy this time and not just bear it with clenched teeth. Continue rejoicing in Me and giving Me glory. Find the blessings that I have given you and be thankful for them. Don't concentrate on what is not right as you think. Exercise to see the blessings. There are more than you can imagine. A heart of thanks will be filled with joy. A heart filled with joy will find strength beyond the natural. Continue praising Me and resting in Me. There are green pastures here, but you have to look carefully for them. There is refreshment and enjoyment for you here...Be diligent to have a grateful heart full of praise and thanksgiving.'"

No matter how old the message is, it still applies to me today. Focusing on what is good, how good God is, all that He has done - this is as much of an exercise today as it was then. Regardless of what I'm facing and how hard it may be, I must not forget the Lord's abundant mercies toward me. With that in view, I have joy and strength to keep going.

One of my favorite lines in this song is in the bridge: "When You allow the battles to show me I am safe."

Here's the vid!

Have a blessed day, remembering all the tender mercies and faithfulness of the Lord today! =)

All glory to Jesus,

Adriel

"Treasure" - Story Behind the Song

"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves do not break in or steal; for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

Matthew 6:19-21

Photo credit: "Treasure Chest" by Flickr user Tom Praison
CC license: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/

What do laundry, a new baby, and this passage of scripture have in common? Anyone? =)

If you're scratching your head and wondering what you missed, don't worry. You didn't miss anything! =)

The answer is this song, "Treasure". The manner in how this song was written is a bit unusual, but I think the Lord works in mysterious, and might I say, unconventional ways.

Our third child was just a few days old (I say a few weeks in the video...I should have checked my notes on the song), I was in the middle of doing laundry, and there was a cry in my heart in the middle of the newborn madness for the Lord. A new baby changes life drastically, and being only a few days into the adjustment, using every waking moment to get something done, my heart was missing the quieter moments with the Lord.

And He knew that. With a touch of sweetness and humor, there I was doing laundry and out of my mouth came the first verse for "Treasure". In my laundry room! haha! I don't know how the Lord was able to speak that song to my heart, but He must have had to shout it, because I'm pretty sure I was too frazzled to hear a whisper.

But in a sense it was a whisper. It was a whisper of, "I love you and I care about you. In this crazy season of life, keep me at the center of your focus. I'm everything you need and more. I'm your Treasure," that made everything at that moment fade away while I worshiped the Lord right there in my laundry room. It was a special, sweet moment that I won't ever forget.

Photo credit: "A little treasure..." by Flickr user Simon Ska
CC license: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/

Songwriting and being in the word of God go hand in hand. God uses the scripture that is tucked away in my heart or the verses that I've been meditating on to draw out a song. The lyrics for "Treasure" focus on some aspects of what and who God is to me. The song is certainly not exhaustive (that would be impossible), but they cover somewhat of a broad range of all that God is.

My hope is that this song encourages you in your walk with Christ and that you would be able to see all that Jesus is to you and more. Many blessings to you through Christ our Savior!

All glory to Jesus!

Adriel

In the "Studio"

I've been asked if I go to a studio to record and/or what the set up looks like for my "home studio", so I thought I'd show you guys some pics I've taken over the past few months of recording.

   First of all, no, I do not go to a recording studio to record. I've never set foot in one. I have no idea what that experience would be like, but I can only imagine how nerve-wracking that would be.

   I record at home. And from these pictures, you'll be able to see that it's really a simple and humble set up. Bonus days, my brother acts as my "sound engineer" and takes care of the software while I lay down vocal tracks. But a good amount of the time, it's just me in our front room with couch cushions and pillows thrown around (as my bass traps...lol). Hey, it works! That tip was given to me by another singer/songwriter. =)

   When I make the YouTube videos, I use my phone to record the video on a tripod that I have sticking out of the banisters on the stairs. I am all about super high tech, guys! lol! For awhile, the phone videos were working out okay and picking up most of what I was singing. But after a recent piano tuning, the piano got louder and I couldn't sing above it anymore in the videos. The piano developed some kind of ego after the tuning or something...I don't know. (Is that a fluke thing, or has that happened to anyone else after a piano tuning?)

Thankfully, I learned a tip from a fellow singer/songwriter, who does videos also, on using a mic during recording and putting the video and the audio together in a separate program after recording. I've been playing around with that, hoping to pick up my vocals more, which it has, but now the piano is a bit muffled. I guess the piano's ego is a bit hurt by me using the mic and is now not trying very hard. haha! =)

   In the closet under the stairs, I keep my keyboard there and put all my recording equipment away in there when I'm done with it. If/when I do any arrangements, I do that in the closet too.

   So that is my "studio" in a nutshell. I'm not going to go into detail about my software or all the little steps that go into recording a song, because it would be extremely boring to write as well as for your to read. But it is quite a process to get a song done from start to finish.

Yeah...we're weird. =P

Thanks for visiting!

Adriel

Story Behind the Song: "Why Are We Silent?"

(Music video is at the bottom if you're in a hurry!) 

  A couple posts ago, I talked about the three big prayers that God has answered for me through my health crisis. One of them was restoring my passion for the lost.

   "Why Are We Silent?" is a song that was written the evening I came home from going out and sharing the gospel. I was so filled and excited! It was such an incredible experience! I remember just sitting down at my keyboard and this song pouring out. It was one of those quickies.

   But I wasn't always pro-evangelism, at least not when it came to me evangelizing. I was all for those called and gifted in evangelism. I even thought I was going to be a missionary when I was a little kid. But being a missionary to me meant going to another country on a missions trip, not talking to people in my own country about the gospel.

   And that was the other thing. I really didn't have a good, accurate understanding of what the gospel of salvation really was until after I was married.

   God used my husband, who is a naturally gifted evangelist, and Way of the Master ministry (which, I'm sure, many of you are familiar with), to not only teach me the true gospel, but to also challenge my resistance to sharing it. At first, I found Way of the Master's approach appalling and offensive. I could not imagine talking to a perfect stranger about sin instead of God's love and forgiveness. But as time went on, I began to understand that the sacrifice of Christ on the cross and the work of salvation wouldn't make sense to a person who wasn't convicted of their sin.

   So I began to share my faith discreetly. Being a reserved, shy person, I wasn't comfortable jumping right into witnessing one-on-one. I'm not saying my approach is the best or ideal, but this is what worked for me. Think getting in a pool gradually, instead of just jumping in...that was me. I began by just leaving tracts here and there while I was out. After washing my hands in a public restroom, I would look around and make sure no one was around and then I would quickly deposit a tract on the sink counter and flee depart from the restroom. Or leave a tract on a table right before running out of leaving a restaurant. I mean, I was sure to NEVER see that server again, right?!

   Right, so I had some serious fear and confidence issues. Not to worry! I then started being able to actually hand a tract to people in person. I know! Wow! =P The girl in the parking lot, the cashier at the store after I had paid...you get the picture. And I slowly began to say intelligible words along with the tract giving instead of just stammering and mumbling something dumb and acting very unnatural. At first it was, "Here you go", or "This is for you". I got bolder and would say, "It's a good person test, to see if you're really a good person", or "Here's a gospel tract. This message is really important". Wow! I was starting to act normal about it! haha! =)

Image used under Creative Commons license,
photo by Chris Yarzab on Flickr

   Then I finally got all the way in! I went out with some other ladies and I think we just ended up at a park talking to some people there, but it got my feet wet and was an awesome experience. After that, a sweet sister and I paired up and went out together a couple other times, while her husband went with mine. We had some really sweet conversations with people, some awkward moments with one or two others, but overall, our times were so fulfilling, so incredible. Seriously, if you've never witnessed to someone, you don't know what you're missing out on! It's a thrill and is exhilarating! =)

Image used under Creative Commons license,
photo by Chris Yarzab on Flickr

   We went out a few more times with other people and there was one time with my mom that puts a lump in my throat when I remember it. There was a group of teenagers at an outside shopping mall and we started talking to them and there was a teenage boy and girl in particular that were really listening. Their friends kind of hung back and weren't interested. But these two young people listened intently. The girl had been in some trouble and her friend had recently died. She was crying as we shared the gospel with them. The young man had never heard anything about God, Jesus, or the Bible. In fact, I don't think he had even seen a Bible before. My mom gave him the one she was carrying. I remember we walked by them again a little while later after we had went on our way that evening and the guy was holding the Bible in a sort of awe and showing his friends. I wonder to this day whatever came of those two young people. Did either of them receive Christ? I guess I'll never know...unless in heaven, I recognize their faces. I truly hope that I do. =)

   One thing I would like to point out is that Way of the Master is a great starting point and they give you great tools to get you started in sharing your faith and encouraging you to continue. But this can quickly and easily become a method that you use mechanically instead of relying on the Holy Spirit to guide you in life-giving conversations with people. Just my two cents.

   And I would say if you are a woman, don't bring up the commandment about adultery and what Jesus says about lusting in your heart (unless the Lord prompts you to). As a woman, you are already vulnerable, but especially when you are speaking to men, this question can be easily turned into something inappropriate. I've experienced this firsthand and it was very unpleasant. There are enough other commandments to help people see the condition of their heart and where they're at with God.

   Anyway, this song is a challenge to us as believers. Why are we silent when lost souls are crying out? I don't know if you ever take time to observe people, but I do sometimes, many times inadvertently. I might be waiting in line at a store and I notice someone and you can read some of their story on their face and you can literally hear their soul crying out. Why are we silent when we've been called to GO and share the gospel to all men? This question: Why are we silent? This is the question I want to encourage all of us to not just think about, but to ask ourselves and do something about. Stop being silent! You have a message to share!

   (By the way, THIS TRACT is my personal favorite because it has the full gospel in it and that is really important to me, because if I'm not able to have that one-on-one conversation with someone, I want them to at least have something they can read that will walk them through the main points in a clear and concise manner.)

"Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost: teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world. Amen."

Matthew 28:19-20

“If sinners will be damned, at least let them leap to Hell over our bodies. And if they will perish, let them perish with our arms about their knees, imploring them to stay. If Hell must be filled, at least let it be filled in the teeth of our exertions, and let not one go there unwarned and unprayed for.”

- Charles Spurgeon

   Here's today's video! I always love to hear what you think about this stuff, so fire away. I know I've shared some heavier stuff lately. It's just what's been on my heart. God bless each of you as your pursue God and His purpose for your lives.

All glory to Jesus,

Adriel

"New in You" - Salvation's Work

   This song highlights what I was before God saved me. I wrote this song down a long time ago. I can't even remember when or why! But the point is that I am new in Jesus and for any true believer in Christ, this song is true as well.

   I love the analogies that go with this song. Think about them. Think about what you were before Christ. Think about where you were headed. Think about the reality of you, as an individual, before becoming a believer.

   And then think about what God did in your life. The profound changes that occurred and still affect you today in how you live, how you talk, how you react, etc. It's amazing, isn't it?

   And this song is just a reminder of that glorious work God has done in my life and in yours if you're a believer as well. Blessings to you, my friends! =)

All glory to Jesus,

Adriel

"I Will Praise You" - Music Friday!

(This post is rather long...video is at the bottom!)

There's not very much to share with you as far as the story behind this song. I don't remember it and my journals are all packed up. Yes, we are in the middle of moving. Three weeks ago, moving was the last thing I imagined I'd be doing right now!

So, I will tell you the story behind our move instead, because it kind of fits in with today's song, being a praise and worship song. And this move is really a blessing that we didn't see coming. And if you can't see how this story has anything to do with the song, that's okay. Just go with it. ;)

(If you're a close friend, you've probably already have heard all this, so just skip it!)

A few years back, 2007 to be exact, before the economy went downhill (we all remember that, right?), my husband and I pursued the ultimate dream of independence and wealth and opened a restaurant. That was stupid, we know. And to add to our stupidity we took out a huge business loan to embark on this venture. My husband's main motive was to get out of debt. Yeah. Get in a lot more debt to get out of the little debt you're in. Smart. It sounded smart at the time when we looked at numbers from other stores and my husband made the business plan. Really, it did. A no-fail plan.

Everything was inflated and the expenses for build out were crazy because everything was expensive then and our home was worth twice as much as it had been when we had bought it in 2001. Do you want to guess what we did? Maybe you're afraid to. I understand. Prepare yourself...

We took out a home equity line of credit and paid off a good chunk of the business loan. We defied those naysayers that said your first year in the restaurant business was your worst. They were so wrong! Our first year was phenomenal! We did awesome! We were the star store of Arizona! Woohoo! We were successful! Ha!

And then the economy tanked. And people stopped eating out so often. And having our own business wasn't quite so appealing anymore. The reality of actually owning our own business crashed down on us, especially my husband who managed it. The hiring and firing, the endless training (there was always someone to train), the constant employee drama (there was a drug ring among some of our employees, would you believe it?!), the dwindling profit, the never-ending work that had to be done all the time, and to add to all that, the huge burden of the debt we were in.

By the grace of God, we sold that store at the end of 2010. Yes, we took a BIG loss. But it was enough to pay off the rest of the business loan and now we only had the mortgage for our house and the HELOC. "Only" isn't the best word to use, but in light of having three loans, two was better. I should add that before we sold the store, Gary had hired a manager and God had graciously provided Gary with another job in the field that he left (to open this lovely business), so we had a steady income with which we were able to cover the payments for these two loans.

A couple of years ago, our family went through a financial seminar and we were able to see, from scripture, that debt was wrong. We had always known that to a degree, but we had never considered a mortgage a "real" debt until we really examined the scriptures and the math. You pay for that house a few times with a mortgage! Goodness!

God greatly impressed on our hearts to get out of debt. And so we diligently stuck with it. We had learned to live on less in the lean months from the store before my husband had gotten another job, so we continued that lifestyle and the rest of the money went toward our debt. Last year, we paid off the mortgage for the house. We were down one with one to go!

My husband is a numbers man and he estimated we would be able to be completely out of debt and have the HELOC paid off in six to seven years. That seemed so far away, but we have been keeping at it. You feel like you're digging a tunnel through a mountain with a shovel, or maybe even a spoon. Slowly.

And then, about three weeks ago, my daughter answered the phone and took a message from the bank where we have the HELOC. After family prayer on a Monday night, my husband said rather casually, "Oh, I called that lady back and our HELOC is maturing in May." Um...!!!!! Apparently, because of changes that the Obama administration has made to these loans, our terms have suddenly changed and $100,000+ is due in May. Um, yeah. Thanks for giving us two months to cough that up. haha!

My husband and I spent some time discussing the situation that evening and the next day. It got us thinking. Really, it was just a push from the Lord in the direction He was wanting us to go in. We, as a family, have made a decision to not get into any more debt. Although we could renew the HELOC (and actually we will to protect the house in case it doesn't sell by May), we didn't have the peace about continuing to stay in debt. It didn't take long for us to arrive at a decision that we both knew was right: Sell our house, pay off the HELOC and rent. NO MORE DEBT!

We decided that if we were going to go to the trouble of moving, we wanted to move into something bigger. We are a family of six in a three-bedroom home right now with 1365 sq. ft. We are very thankful for our current house and have found creative ways to make it work for us. My husband has gone crazy with adding storage wherever he has been able to. And the truth is, we could keep living here and we would be happy. We were quite prepared to stay in this house for a number of years and pay off the HELOC little by little. But God has decided to move us into something bigger that will meet our needs better in this season of our life.

We looked at a few homes that very same week, but none were right for us. Toward the end of the week, we looked at one more. It was incredible! Gary called about it and got the initial papers turned in along with the processing fee. We found out we were first in line and there were other people after us interested in it. God literally led us to this house and everything went through and we our move in date is April 1st.

No joke, guys, this all happened so fast, we were just shocked! I mean, it was basically one week and everything was in place for a completely new direction for our lives. When God wants to move (or wants you to move, literally!), He will make it happen!

So that is the crazy story of our life right now! I am so blessed by what God has done and is doing and how He has led us. A year ago, I would be bummed out about all this. I would be focusing on everything that I'm losing. But I am so thankful to see how God has been slowly changing how I look at things and that I have been able to see how He is blessing us at this very moment through this circumstance. It amazes me how good He is!

I hope you enjoy this simple praise and worship song. May each one of you see the marvelous work of God in your lives, even in the things that don't look great at first glance. God is worthy of everything we can offer Him! Have a blessed day!

All glory to Jesus,

Adriel

"In the Middle" - Story Behind the Song

(Song is at the bottom if you're in a hurry!)

Image credit: "In the Middle II" by flickr user Hartwig HKD
CC license: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/2.0/

This song...I don't remember what was going on when I wrote it. The only clues I have are from my journal and that year, we had opened up a restaurant. I had concerns over that. I see that I wrote about being in a wilderness of sorts and that I was asking God to help me not look at my circumstances. But perhaps the most telling is this entry from just four days after writing this song:

8/9/07   "I had to trim my tomato plants a couple of days ago. The plants were growing so wild and the weight from the tops of them was bringing the whole plant down upon itself. In trimming it, I had to cut off parts of the plant that had very small, very dwarfed tomatoes. These tomatoes would have never reached their full potential. Instead, they would have matured into fruit that could not have been used and in addition to this, the energy and resources that went into them would have taken away from the rest of the plant.
   Last night, I was contemplating this, as sometimes it is the same in my own life. God does pruning and I look at the pile of trimmings and there is dwarfed fruit in the pile. I complain to the Lord, pointing out that there is 'fruit after its own kind' in the pile. It's true that since it is fruit that should be there, it is therefore arguably 'good' fruit. But what if this supposedly 'good' fruit would never reach its full potential, that it would never be used; that instead, its only purpose was to suck life out of the plant and the rest of the good fruit. It shouldn't remain.
   I don't know if I'm fully grasping the entire message in this picture, but I do know it has helped me see more about God's pruning. I tend to lose heart during that process. In actuality, the Lord is really narrowing my focus to the fruit that will completely mature and be useful. God is much more aware of the fact that chaff will be burned up; the excess that cannot be used will be destroyed.
   Thank God that He takes the time now to trim us! If He waited until the end of this age, there would be a great deal of 'waste'. He certainly has our best interest in mind when He prunes us!"

   And that, my friends, is the story behind this song, "In the Middle". I was in the middle of struggling with God over my situation at the time, but it doesn't take long to realize that it's simply useless to struggle with God. What good does it do? And why do we think we know better?

   As I'm in the middle of another situation that is difficult, I find encouragement in these past experiences and my heart takes comfort in being reminded that God is my Father, He loves me, He wants to prosper me and do me good. I'm learning to surrender. I'm learning to say "thank you" with each snip of the pruning shears, even though it's painful. I'm learning to love those dear hands that are molding me - a lifeless, dull, ugly lump of clay - into a vessel that the Potter can use in His house, though they may work me in a way that doesn't make sense or is uncomfortable. Yes, I am learning. Praise God for being such a patient teacher.

   I leave you with the verse that was written along with the journal entry I shared with you.

"Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing."

James 1:2-4

All glory to Jesus,

Adriel

"Keep Me Walking" - Story Behind the Song

   There are a few songs that I don't remember the background of...the setting just escapes my memory. But for the majority of them, I do remember fairly well why/when I wrote them down.

   It's quite interesting, really, how these songs are like pictures. Snapshots of time. Forever memories.

   This song - wow. I read the words, I hear the melody and I remember the setting clearly (not to mention I've got a journal that helps if my memory ever gets hazy).

   There are details that I do not think are appropriate to share with you, as the background involves other people whom I don't wish to uncover publicly.

   I can tell you, however, that I felt like I was walking on slippery ground. The environment was dangerous. My desire was to walk uprightly before the Lord. I didn't know what else to do, but to cry out to my Father God to keep my steps safe and secure.

   And that is the key. Instead of focusing on how wrong other people are walking, focus on your walk, though it may be riddled with stumbling blocks from said people. Draw the circle around yourself, stay in the light, walk circumspectly, examine yourself...however you slice it up, do that. God will honor a sincere, humble cry for help. He wants to keep us from slipping, from taking those wrong steps. God is ready and willing. Pour your heart out to Him.

All glory to Jesus Christ,

Adriel

"Blessed is the Man" - Story Behind the Song

   "How blessed is the man who has made the Lord his trust..."

Psalm 40:4a

   I honestly don't know when I wrote the words down for this song. All I know is that in September of 2006, with the same background as a few others songs that I've shared recently (hard times make for a busy songwriting season!), I found a piece of paper with most, if not all, of the words for this song written on it in my papers. I went to the piano and God had a tune at that time for the words. 

   Amazing...years and years those words sat. And then, years later when it was the right time, God gave me the tune. And it happened to be just the right time in my life for this song. God is just incredible! =)

   So, that is the background behind this song. I hope you enjoy it and that it blesses you!

All glory to Jesus,

Adriel

"All Things New" - Story Behind the Song

   I can tell you some of the story behind this song, but not all of it. The fact is, the story is not yet finished. I hope one day that I will be able to share the rest of the story with you and that it has a happy ending.

   This song was written many years ago in response to an ugly situation that I thought had been resolved, but I could not have been more wrong. It is yet to be resolved, but I have faith that one day what I believe in faith will one day be reality.

   I have continued singing it and believing that it is true and one day will be true for the original situation it was intended for.

   In the meantime, I find the words comforting and encouraging as I pass through other trials and hardships. I hope that it blesses you too.

"To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified."

Isaiah 61:3

All glory to Jesus,

Adriel

"In This Hour" - Story Behind the Song

   This song was written under the same circumstances of "Wait" back in 2006, which you can read about HERE.

   This time, though, I wanted to share some from the journal I kept during that time. Here is a journal entry from just a few days prior to the song being written down:

"'Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say rejoice! Let your forebearing spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near. Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, shall guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.'

Philippians 4:4-7

   I read these verses today, and even though I know they're true, I have a hard time holding on to them for myself.

   I need your help, Lord. To rest in You and embrace Your peace. I am beyond weary. My hope has to be in You, Lord. I ask for mercy. Have mercy on me...I have nothing left. I am so exhausted! Be gracious to me, Lord. Please, lighten this load. Your Word says that You do not give us more than we can bear...I don't know how much more I can bear. I am spent. Please bring some relief. Even just a small amount. I want to be fruitful to You. Show me how to please You even in the middle of this."

   And with that, I leave you with this humble video of "In This Hour".

  
   I promise the next song I share will be happier. This is just part of the journey. =)

All glory to Jesus,

Adriel

Bummer to Blessing - "Wait"

   Waiting on God isn't the easiest for us as human beings. We like to fix problems, get out of uncomfortable situations as quickly as possible and we would rather run away from trials than face them. Fortunately, we have a Father who knows what is best for us, His children.

   I got my journal out from when "Wait" was written in 2006. I was facing health challenges, there were some serious situations that friends were facing, our times of prayer with the brethren felt like battles, we had some heartbreaking things occur in our extended family, and it was the year we had left our beloved church family that Gary and I had spent our entire married life, up to that point, with, Gary having spent a few years prior to our marriage there as well. It was a tough time. It was difficult.

   I'm not going to try to make this blog all pretty and sweet and pretend like my life is perfectly wonderful when it's really not. I used to be really concerned with how I appeared to other people. I prided myself on looking like I had it all together, even when inside I was completely feeling insane. I could pull it off pretty well. I was good at fooling people, which is bad. Let's just say I was pretty much forced to let all that go for a period of time and I discovered that being real and authentic was a much better way of living than pretending like all was well when it really wasn't. I've always admired people who were real, because they were so relatable. Of course, I could never bring myself to be that real...people would find out I wasn't perfect!! <gasp>

   Needless to say, my posts are going to be raw and real, some more so than others, and the fact is that the other day I faced feelings of despair in regard to my health. As I struggled with my soul - to be thankful, content, submissive to God's will - the Lord put this song on my heart again. It was almost as if He said, "Remember that song?" Yeah, I remembered that song. I went looking for it in my folder of songs. I never did find it...had to print a new copy.

   Funny how long it's been since I played that song...a really long time. And although it was void of chords, I could still remember how to play it. So I made a video for whoever out there who needs some encouragement to wait on God. I sure do and it speaks to my heart! What seemed like a bummer became a blessing. Isn't that so neat how God can do that? He's so amazing!

   
   By the way, I've seen different people stating what their word of the year is. After taking a little step back and looking at what God has been putting on my heart so far, I think it's safe to say that my word for this year is "WAIT".

   I wish I could say that I am thrilled. I'm not. My flesh says, "Not more waiting!" But I know God will get my heart to where He wants it to be. My prayer is that I learn to wait...without wandering and without doubting. That my faith would be strengthened as I wait. Hey, the Bible is full of promises for those who wait! And that's an encouragement to me. So with that in mind, here is one of my favorite scripture promises regarding waiting on the Lord:

"But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk,
and not faint."

Isaiah 40:31

Waiting,

Adriel 

Life is a Gift - "But for a Moment"

I wonder if any of us are really fully aware of how much of life - how much of what we are able to do, how much of what we have, how much of who we are - is a gift.

Before my health crisis, I know that I didn't even think of life being the gift that it is. I took it for granted.

I was capable, determined, strong, self-sufficient, composed, prepared, in control. Or so I thought. Such an illusion all of that was. Such a lie.

I do not claim to see life completely for the gift that it truly is, but I know I see it more clearly now than I ever did before.

Everything about life - every aspect - is a gift.

There is nothing like a jolt of reality to help you see the truth: Without God, we are nothing.

It was obvious to me I wasn't capable when I couldn't take care of my family. Determination didn't really amount to much when everything I tried and everything I did to get better made me get worse and worse. I clearly couldn't claim strength when I was too weak to hold my baby or even my Bible for that matter. Yes, even my Bible was too heavy for me to hold. Self-sufficiency was non-existent as I was dependent upon others for nearly everything. Composure was the last thing I was thinking of when, for weeks, I began not being able to sleep but an hour or two each night and I felt like the inside of my body was on fire. I was in utter agony and I thought I was going to lose my mind. When I was crying and begging God to keep me each little moment throughout the day and not let me go crazy, composure was all but gone. Prepared? No. I was completely unprepared for what I faced. It totally blind-sided me. And I realized as I felt my life slipping away and death's grip on me that I was not in control of anything. This was not how I had pictured life looking, but I couldn't do anything about it.

None of those things - ability, strength, self-sufficiency...you name it. None of it was true. Nothing.

I think sometimes God has to bring us to places as desperate as what I just described to make use face the fact that everything we are able to do, every good aspect about ourselves, everything that makes our life what it is, is a gift, pure and simple. Even sleep. I never thought of sleep being such a blessed gift until my body couldn't sleep. You don't know how thankful I am for sleep now!

I know that I still take many things for granted, but I'm learning to be grateful and thankful to the Lord for even things that may seem small to others. Even the strength to sit here and type this post is a gift. There was a time when even that was too taxing.

I remember a moment on one of those bleak days when I didn't have the strength to walk, sitting in a parking lot waiting for my husband to get something at a store, watching people walk in and out of that store and wondering to myself how many of them realized what a gift it was to have the strength to walk like a normal, healthy person.

When you've had things stripped away and God gives them back to you, they appear much more as they really are: as gifts. Nothing that I could conjure up by myself. Simply gifts from my Heavenly Father.

Last winter was a difficult time for me, but today I am thankful for it. I know that the trial I passed through and continue walking though was and is a gift.

Perhaps you are in a season of winter yourself, feeling destitute and dead, wondering if spring will ever come again. I know...I wondered that, too.

This time of the year is usually merry and jolly for many people. But I know there are others who are hurting more than they can express. I've posted a video below with a song to encourage you if you are one of those people.

Don't give up hope! God will never leave or forsake you.

In Christ's love,

Adriel

"Amazing" - Video

I did another quick video on Friday, which I call "Music Friday", because every week or so, my mom will let the kids hang out with her so I can work on music. That is what Music Friday is around here. =)

I wanted to share the video with you today. It's a worship song highlighting the gospel, what that means for us, and our response to the Lord in regards to what He has done for us, specifically being set free to live for Him.

I give a rather lengthy background and commentary on the song, so I won't repeat that here. You certainly don't need to hear it twice! And if you don't like listening to people talk, especially people like me that rattle on and on, the actual song is around 4:25. Yeah, I talk for almost 4-1/2 minutes! I'm not sure I'd do that in real life...I'm kind of shy, believe it or not...but the camera is not as intimidating as actual people, even though I know I'm talking to someone real. Anyway, I'm rambling again...here's the video. God bless you today! ~ Adriel

"Keep Me" Music Video

I did this music video for my friend, Karen. Some people are more visual, which she is, and this is her favorite song of mine. I thought I would share it with those of you who are visual as well. =)

I hope it encourages you today to stay covered by the Lord, abiding in Him throughout your day, whatever place you are at in your life at the present moment.

You may be looking at the sheer side of a mountain, wondering how you can possibly succeed in scaling it. Surrounded on all sides, the only way is up...but how?

Your boat may be capsized and waves may be crashing over and over you, and you can barely catch your breath. The sky is dark and cloudy, the sea angry and you wonder if you will survive this storm.

You may not be facing any big decisions or trials at this time. Your way is clear, your path level and easy. Your sea may be calm, the sky perfectly clear and sunny and everything is going absolutely wonderful for you.

Wherever you may be, the need for us to abide with Jesus is still true. May God keep you close to His heart.

To read the original post of and story behind this song, go HERE.

All glory to Jesus,

Adriel

New Melodies to Hymns Continued

  I enjoyed all the feedback I got regarding new melodies to hymns. It was enlightening and encouraging to hear what each of you had to say. So I made a video of a hymn with a new tune! (I am completely new to videoing and that whole process, and I am really surprised at the bad quality video from our relatively new video recorder, but...)

  The other day I decided to just browse through an unknown hymn site (or else I would tell you where I was), and a title caught my attention because I had never heard it or of it for that matter.

  I really appreciated the lyrics, but there was no info regarding the hymn as to the year it was written, etc. I decided to do some investigating, because I certainly did not want to get into any hot water by using a hymn that wasn't "public domain".

  The story behind this hymn was very touching and I've included a link HERE where you can read it yourself if you would like, but I do cover that briefly in the video if you want a condensed version. =)

Here's the video. Sorry it's not the greatest. I'll be looking into ways to improve for (possible) future recordings. ;-)

All glory to Jesus,

Adriel